Here are the wheels off my WRX STi, yes, they still look like that after 6 years of ownership and have no curb rush either.
My favorite wheels cleaner is P21S, it eats away Brembo brake dust and will not harm the wheel finish.
A pressure washer is a must if you want to achieve good results.
You'll also need a good wheel brush made from teflon, a cardboard box to place the wheels on so they don't scratch on the floor or wherever you're working.
For wheel sealant, I use Poorboy's wheel sealant (don't let the name brand fool you).
I do this once a year, taking off all 4 wheels and cleaning them by hand.
A good pair of dish washing gloves will keep the brembo dust off your hands. (Brake dust is not a very healthy substance)
Spray each wheel with the pressure washer to get off the dirt, then spray it with P21S wheel cleaner and let that sit for a bit.
Get the brush wet with some water and start scrubing.
Hose off the wheel.
Repeat until the wheels are clean.
Dry the wheels with a towel.
Now you can apply the wheel sealant and buff.
2. I also use this as an opprotunity to detail the wheel wells, brake calipers.
For wheel wells you'll need P21S general cleaner (red/white bottle) or Adam's all purpose cleaner.
Hose the wheel wells off and then spray them with some cleaner. Scrub with the teflon brush and hose them off.
Dry them with a towel and then you can apply some plastic/vinyal spray to make them shine a bit.